Why does a gorgeous girl who appears to have everything take her own life? It is the question I've been asking myself all day.
Watching The Bachelor is a guilty pleasure that my husband and I share. We watch it religiously every season despite A's declarations after every frustrating episode that he's not watching it anymore. It is a show filled with beautiful people - some who seem to have everything together and others...well, not so much.
The train wrecks are certainly entertaining. But we also watch it for the potential of true love. To root for our favorite cast member and hope to see their love story unfold.
One of the most beautiful people to appear on Bachelor and Bachelor Pad in 2010 was Gia Allemand. She was one of our favorites from the beginning with her sweet demeanor. Like the rest of America, A and I watched as she got her heart broke by Jake Pavelka. The fact that Jake chose the dramatic Vienna over our lovely Gia was flabbergasting. Then we thought she might've found love with Wes Hayden on Bachelor Pad.
That didn't work out.
But Gia did find love off-screen with a boy named Ryan Anderson. Ryan, a pro basketball player for the New Orleans Pelicans, and Gia have been dating for a few years. They seemed so happy. Gia was over-the-moon about him and thought he was the one.
Ryan is from my hometown. His sister Rachel does my make up and we've chatted about what a cute couple Ryan and Gia make. In fact, Gia and I exchanged these tweets just last year when I ran into Ryan at a restaurant near my home.
Yesterday, I heard that Gia was in the hospital in critical condition. I've been thinking about her and saying prayers for her and her loved ones for the last 24 hours. Assuming that she'd been involved in some horrific accident, her condition reminded me how short life could be for any of us.
I didn't know she'd attempted suicide.
Now that I know, I can't stop asking myself...why.
At 29 years old, she was in the prime of her life.
Ridiculously gorgeous. Former model. Actress.
An amazing boyfriend and a family who loves her.
No money problems that I'm aware of.
From the outside looking in, she had everything.
How does life get so bad that you're willing to end it?
I can't even comprehend the level of pain, angst and depression that she must've been feeling on Monday to decide that hanging herself was a better option than living.
It is a reminder that things aren't always what they appear to be. I know nothing more about Gia's life than what she (herself) put out there on Twitter and Instagram. Maybe a little more through my connection with her boyfriend's sister. But she seemed vivacious, happy and living a full life...that anyone would be happy to have.
I don't know why she took her own life. The people closest to her may not even know.
But I want to say a prayer right now for all of the people suffering in their own private hell. And the loved ones left behind when someone decides their life has become...unlivable.